 | Currently Playing
Superhero
By Stephen Lynch
i LOVE this guy! the most funny...i love funny...i want a funny boyfriend..
see related |
the fabulous life of Christine...
1-so its 9:45 at night and I'm in my kitchen and I see my land lord pointing to our new blue wall through our window...she's showing it to a friend and she is obviously very upset about it. So we figure she will come by during business hours tomorrow and talk to us about it. We're wrong. Despite the fact that there are six different houses in our complex constantly toked out, the next door neighbors have parties so crazy that people have jumped from the balcony to the pool at 3 am on a Wednesday (I actually was there for that party...what can I say, I'm social) and the other neighbors fight all the time and have thrown a table through the front window...at one at night...and the guy below us didn't pay rent for three months, we (the nice , friendly college girls who never do drugs, throw parties, are always on time with rent, and get along with everyone)are the apartment she has decided to hate...because our wall is blue...yeah...by the way, our apartment isn't trashy like it sounds, its full of teens...teens are drama...you know...
so 10:00 PM rolls around fifteen minutes later and she knocks on our door. She says that there was a noise complaint...which isn't possible considering that the neighbors next to us are watching independence day with surround sound, the neighbors on the other side aren't home, there is no one currently living below us to the left, and the people below is to the right are passed out from pot smoking, and the girls directly below us just borrowed out copy of Chicago to practice a dance routine...so she's is a liar.
we tell her we will keep it down.
she says, oh, by the way, what made you think you could paint your wall blue?
we say "the fact that the girls below us got permission to paint their walls deep purple, and we signed the same contract so therefore we are granted the same permission.
she says that our wall is "undeniably gorgeous"-oh and it IS undeniable-but that we have to paint it back because we didn't ask her permission.
we say "well, according to the landlord-tennent act of 87' if you live in a place longer than six months you can paint it because after at least six months of living you're required to repaint it before you leave" and then we let her know that we fully intend to paint it back before we go.
she then tells us it is amazingly beautiful but she is not familiar with that law so she still thinks we have to paint it back.
my rommie says 'look, this is a true act that is for the whole state of California, you can look it up tomorrow. besides we have before and after pictures and our walls weren't even all one color before.
she says sarcastically "I'm sure, that real cute, girls"
so I say "no, we really do, I will go get them."
she says "you don't have to , if you didn't mention them before you moved in they aren't our problem."
so my roommate says - God bless her- this sound like a power struggle. you win. If you want us to paint the wall back then let us know when it needs to be white again. but check out the 87' act tomorrow before you do."
she continued to try and argue with us for five minutes after that despite the fact that we told her we would paint it back. all this yelling outside our door right after she told us there was a "noise complaint" and -the ironic part- you can hear apartment six's music...way on the other side of our complex, the whole time.
so she finally leaves and ten minutes later she comes storming by to issue another noise complaint to our surround sound neighbors and we can hear her Jurassic park footsteps every time she pounds past our place. so as she walks by, Tracy yells "hey, keep it down, we're trying to sleep in here!"
....and they never came back to tell us to paint it white...we win! another victory for apartment twelve.
more on my family, friends, and neigbors later. have a good day! | 
